So how do we approach saving a relationship with someone who has unrealistic expectations of what a long-term relationship looks like. With that same attitude they will rise up on the other side of the veil. My wife and her family are a good example of this.
I can honestly say it has been the worst decision of my life. He is doing 2nd year Residency. She is a returned missionary, and won't Marry you if you want to stay atheist. Mormon girls are raised to believe their worth is how young they marry and how many kids they have. Intimacy is pretty much gone. She wants the captain of a ship who can direct all aspects of a relationship, including spiritual direction. I got the news that my mother suddenly died when I was with him. This can also be the basis for forming important friendships, and learning proper skills for social interaction. The church can be a very cruel place for single people. Her beliefs are innocous but ultimately a death sentence for this relationship.
She didn't tell anyone because her own lack self worth and shame petrified her to do anything about it. I really do have strong feelings for him and want to make this work… but I'm beginning to feel like I have no identity of my own anymore and I will forever just be, "the doctor's wife. I never pressure him to spend time with me. Our daughter is 6. I have learned this painfully with my child growing up in the LDS community.
If she is open to questioning her faith, perhaps she can chase you down. What goes on in those sacred temples. Living in an interfaith, marriage can be hell. At that point we quit going and focused on her goals and family bonding. As an atheist with Buddhist undertones who married a non-practicing, god-believing Mormon at the height of his questioning, I find this so interesting to me. Finding a person with whom your wavelength matches, and around whom you feel you can just be yourself, talk about anything, and not be worried about being judged, is not as easy as the romantic movies and TV soaps make it out to be. I have rediscovered what I love about the church but choose not to attend or participate. Thanks for the help.